Dont worry, people who have penises: You arent being left out of all the ridiculous fashion going down.
Rather than taking distressed denim to new heights, these trousers are, all in all, pretty complete. You bum isnt on show, there are no giant slashes, and they do indeed function as trousers should.
Theres just one strange thing about them: they have a pocket directly over the penis area.
Not a subtle pocket, we add. A contrast pocket, seemingly designed to draw everyones eyes directly to your crotch.
The patch does indeed function as a pocket, but were not sure what one would actually put in there.
Keys, wallet, phone – theyd all create a bumpy appearance that we doubt youd want directly over your genitals.
The pocket is also very slim, and only functions when your trousers are zipped and buttoned up. So any valuables youd put in there would likely thud out when you went for a piss.
The trousers are the creation of GU, a clothing brand owned by the same people who run Uniqlo, and unlike most weird fashion items, theyre extremely affordable at under a tenner.
Of course, you could also create your own version of the trousers by painting your jeans crotch area with Tipex. Thatll draw attention directly to your penis, which we presume is the primary reason you would wear such a fashion statement.